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The Question
12/14/09 12:33 PM

"How do I tell the food police to go away?"
Asked By: eurekaroe  
Category: Food and Nutrition

Background Info Hide
My mother in law is constantly reading self help books on diet and what to eat. We live on her property so I feel like I have to be nice to her. She is always telling me and my husband we need to eat healthier. I don't want to damage our relationship, but I want her being the food police to stop. I can't take it anymore. I have type 1 diabetes, and insulin pump, and a CGM. I want to have diabetes, manage it successfully and have a life.

Expert Answers (2)

12/14/09 06:38 PM

Hello,

Thanks for asking dLife.

Having well-meaning family members close by can be very challenging. Although they may have our best interest in mind, sometimes constant reminders can get tiresome.

Consider sitting down and telling your mother-in-law that you appreciate her thoughtfulness and support. You are already doing all that you can to achieve and maintain a healthy lifestyle. She is so well-read on healthful eating. You know exactly to whom to call upon when you do need additional information.

Hopefully she will get the message. If not, suggest another hobby to sustain her time and energy.

Good luck!

Answered By: Liz Quintana
Accreditations: EdD, RD, LD, CDE
Sources Show
12/18/09 04:26 PM

There's an article you might like right here:

Beware the Food Police

One idea is to take advantage of her interest and knowledge and ask her to do some research for you on a specific thing. Maybe you could ask her where to find the best low carb products, or to get the scoop on sugar alcohols in sugar-free candy. Give her a project to distract her from policing your eating habits!

Answered By: Lynn Prowitt-Smith
Accreditations: Senior Editor, Food and Nutrition
Sources Show

Community Answers (6)

12/18/09 03:00 PM

Sounds like your significant other might wind up becoming an insignificant other ;-)
Answered By: jcrick
FLAG
SourcesShow


12/18/09 12:54 PM

My significant other gets very obnoxious at times when it comes to my diet. I really, really hate it, but he just persists. I no longer explain myself or my diet to the diet police. While I understand that the diet police may have my best interests at heart, I regard it as an unwelcomed intrusion. Most of the time my diet police don't know what they're talking about, nor do they know or understand how I am taking care of myself. It's pointless to argue with this people. Just smile and shrug it off. Why do we need to explain ourselves anyway?
Answered By: nyc94610
FLAG
SourcesShow


12/16/09 03:14 PM

In general, the food police go away when I let them know that I know more about my disease than they do. However, it sounds like what you're dealing with is more of a mothering issue than anything specific to your diabetes. Find out if your mother-in-law has always been concerned about the diets of her children (or maybe their health?). This may be her "worry" of choice. Most moms worry - some more obsessively than others. Some are direct with sharing the remedy they've devised for us to follow and some use hint and innuendo. My husband and I team up to understand each others' mothers. We share coping methods and support each other when we feel "fed up" with the occasional overbearing suggestion. Feeling that partnership no only helps us love our mothers better, it gives us a safe place to vent!
Answered By: kimbersullivan
FLAG
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12/16/09 10:46 AM

In the short time I have been working to improve my health and lifestyle, the food police are by far the most aggravating issue to deal with. What is most egregious about these people is the extent in which they will got out of their way to tell me what I can and can't have while paying absolutely no attention to their own food choices.I usually limit these folks to three 'free' passes to leave me alone and mind their own business.

The first time I politely acknowledge some appreciation for their well intentioned concern, but so far I have successfully managed my diet plan very well and that I have already accounted for my food choice(s).

If the same person persists again to intrude in my personal affairs, my second pass is somewhat the same but in a firmer tone I additionally offer to loan them some reading material if they would care to learn more about the subject.

The last 'free' pass is firmer still and includes some light sarcasm. I tell them that with the advice of my professional healthcare team, I am managing my health quite well. If however, in the future should myself or my doctor become stumped over a problem then I will seek THEM out ask for THEIR expert opinion.

While I have handed out many level one passes, and a few level twos, so far I have only had to resort to level three once. And those who know me well enough, know they definitely don't want any part of level four or beyond because then it starts getting ugly.

Answered By: jcrick
FLAG
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12/15/09 11:35 AM

What I do when the "food police" start in on me is I start talking all about healthy eating and GI GL - they get board really fast and tend to leave me alone. I also tell people that I plan for the "unhealthy meals" ahead. For example if I know bread or pasta is on the menu for dinner, as with our extended family they are often. I am sure to eat a lot of fiber and protein through out the rest of the day. I also request that pasta be whole wheat and the bread be sour dough and or I offer to bring those along. Tends to let people know I am in control and I am not going to be ragged on! :-) BTW so far I have made it through Thanksgiving with no weight gain!
Answered By: gina97071
FLAG
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12/15/09 08:46 AM

With you being a type 1 or a type 2 healthy eating is important. Its possible the your mother in law doesnt realize that changing what you ate would not change the fact you will still be a type 1. These days it seems on every corner there are health nuts breaking out of the cupboards. I to believe in healthy eating but there is a fine line, tell you for being a type 1 you eat very healthy and I hope you do and tell her that your bs are in fine control and that is what matters.
Answered By: furball64801
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