Woodsy

I feel extra different today.

I think all people with diabetes feel like this every once and a while. That feeling of being different or just feeling like no one understands.

Seeing the candy jars on desks and the bagels in the break room don’t help. Seeing people walking in from the kitchen with a bagel covered in cream cheese and raving about how delicious they are gets to me.

At least it is getting to me more today.

Not that I can’t have those things. I know that I can and I should never feel limited by my disease but having to check my BG, figure out the carb count of whatever I am going to eat, and then take the right amount of insulin to off set those carbs is a lot of work for half a bagel.

That’s makes me different. I cannot just eat what I want when I want without going through all these steps. Sometimes I don’t want to think. I don’t want to have to wait to dig in. At times I have no clue what the carb count is on a piece of cake that is homemade. It is a lot of work.

People see me run to grab my machine and open up my carbohydrate counting book to figure out what to enter into my pump. They see me as different.

I try to act like this disease does not get to me but it does sometimes. Sometimes it makes me feel like I stand out.

I know I am not alone. How do you deal with these feelings when they hit you?