Lows come in all shapes and sizes. They come with grueling symptoms or no symptoms at all. They come with reason and purpose, and other times with no cause in sight. Sometimes they're short-lived and sometimes they linger for hours. For me, lows come in several forms:
The worst kind, the night low: Night lows for me come sometime between 2am and 6am. Usually it's a reading in the 50's or 40's that wakes me from a deep sleep. I wake with panic in my heart, it pounds in my chest. My body coated in sweat, the sheets damp under me. And an overwhelming weakness that leaves my knees shaking in the darkness. For me, this is the worst low because I have a history of seizures. I'm deathly afraid that one of these lows won't wake me or I won't catch it in time. Glucagon stashed by my bed does nothing to quell the fear. The only peace of mind is having someone close by listening for the sounds of a low.
A notch above this is the low that comes in silence: It's usually an afternoon low that hits this way. Somewhere between 40 and 50 generally. I feel fine, until a tiny pang in my stomach tells me that something is wrong. It's an indescribable feeling. But the second it hits, I know. And the meter always confirms. Within seconds, I'm struggling to walk, to manage my words, and to feel anything but that gut-wrenching fear. It's debilitating, leaving me feeling like I may never wake up from a really bad dream.
Another silent low, but without the after effects: Generally, this low hits me in the evening after a meal. I feel fine, completely okay. Just a tiny hint of something off in my body. It can be a 50, a 65, or a 70...but they all feel the same. Nothingness. Too much insulin roaming around my body, catching me off guard.
The most annoying low: This comes strictly between 75 and 95. All of a sudden, nausea passes over me. Sometimes I get a little thirsty and sometimes my head starts to ache, but the nausea is always the deciding factor. They don't come from specific causes, just my body being stubborn. And almost always, my head hurts for the rest of the day no matter how quickly I treat it.
The non-low: Technically, this isn't a low because my meter reads a number above the cutoff (100+ for me). But it feels like a low. When my body passes signals through my nerves that my blood sugar isn't where it should be. Sometimes it's a sudden drop that does it. Or sometimes just a fluke in the diabetes world. But it always feels the same...butterflies in my stomach, a speeding pulse, and shaky limbs.
Diabetes is tricky. All these kinds of lows that have perfected their symptoms over the years, leaving me anxious and unaware. Even within their confines, I never know when or how they'll strike. Lows rebel. Diabetes rebels. Just like life.
