I received a comment on my post from yesterday that really struck a chord with me. The reader commented that their parents had died from diabetes and that they would die from it too.

When I read that I got choked up because honestly, I feel the same way.

Sure I plan on fighting the fight and checking my blood as often as I am supposed to. Of course I will continue to work on my A1C and losing weight. I am not giving up on life at all. But, in the back of my mind I “know” that diabetes is going to win in the end.

Will it be heart disease, kidney failure, or a stroke? Maybe something else. Who knows?

The fact is that with all the steps I take to live healthy the odds are against me. Diabetes has the upper hand which makes me sad and angry at the same time.

I have never been afraid of dying. Death has never really scared me. My fear is how badly I will suffer before I die.

The thought of losing limbs and sight terrify me. Being hooked up to machines and slowly deteriorating also deeply frightens me.

All I can do it continue on living each day to the fullest and attempt to manage this seemingly unmanageable disease in hopes that my efforts are successful at curbing its chance at causing my death.

I hate diabetes.