The new year is off to an auspicious start. Despite being hampered by pink eye and a very nasty cold, I've already accomplished my first resolution – grow a manageable light winter beard as a distraction to increasingly thinning hair. Done!

Christmas was nice. Santa rocked it. Although …

I hate to be nitpicky, but there was one Christmas present under the tree that we just had to throw out due to the odor. Remind me next year to specify in my letter to Santa that "working pancreas for Charlie" should be kept on ice.

But Christmas is all fun and reindeer games until your 9-year-old daughter begins reading aloud from The Little Book of Stupid Questions you received as a stocking stuffer. You know, the one that you haven't looked at yet, but you assume contains benign questions like "If you could have one super power, what would it be?" or "Which celebrity would you choose to have dinner with?"

While playing air hockey with Charlie, I couldn't have seen this coming. And thankfully, she had no idea what she was asking me.

"Dad, do you consider yourself well endowed? (pronounced en-doughed) What animal would you say you're "hung like?"

(ripping book out of her hands) "It's enDOWed. I. Uh. That's a ...  Who wants ice cream!!!!!!! Wooohooooo!!!! Let's go everyone!!!!! Downstairs!!! Ice cream!!!!! Yay!!!!!! Sorry, Charlie. Game over."

Charlie's blood sugars were dreadful in the days before New Year's Eve – when he spiked a fever. Insane and unexplained numbers reaching levels you'd only want to see if you were in Indianapolis or Daytona. It is interesting though, that his blood sugar gives us advance notice that something is brewing and something wicked this way comes. Do many of you find that your blood sugars are elevated in the days before a virus reveals itself? Or is Charlie just special? It's sort of cool having that inside information. Knowing what's going to happen before it happens.

Unfortunately the blood sugars remained crazy high even after the virus went away. Therefore, we feel we've narrowed it down to a virus-growth spurt-stress-carb-scar tissue-air bubble issue.

I also feel the U.S. auto industry is somehow responsible.