I have been pondering traveling the world lately. I can’t quite seem to narrow down exactly what I want to do, but I know it has something to do with traveling the globe, being around others, and spreading peace. The thing I realize, and that we/I sometimes forget, is there is something to be said about a person who just “jumps”. In other words, instead of losing myself in thoughts of what might happen or where I might end up, or how I will get my (diabetic) supplies…I’m more interested in just living and the experiences that come along with it. The idea of just spreading my wings and flying…no matter what happens.

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I got laid off last week.

I got a call from my (now former) boss, whom I love, care, and have deep respect for very much, on Tuesday. Her mood and energy were off. I could tell she was under a lot of (mind-made) stress. I was told that I would need to call in for a phone meeting with some of the higher-ups and board members in the organization. My mind and thoughts began to wonder, like everyone's does, when you get that feeling
inside. That feeling where you just KNOW something is off.

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As I type this, I am in a very humbled and still space. My mind is at ease and peace with all that is in my life right now, the only time there is. I’m sitting outside in the warm Florida night air. The sounds of the crickets by the water nearby is heavenly, their song a familiar and calming chorus. The air is pure and clean and healthy to breathe deep into my lungs. I sit here by a candle I have lit and I work from its light. Other beautiful sounds are mixed into the night’s choir like the distant rumbling of a jet-engine in the beautiful moon-light-filled sky. The random ticking of various animals and nature keeps me in this meditative state. It’s so beautiful. Life is precious and I am so thankful for each moment that I have here.
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Wow.  What an unbelievable adventure life is.  I don't even know where to begin today.  I guess one thing that I wanted to share is that I recently moved.  Last weekend I was in a bad way.  It's no secret - just look at my past entries - that I have struggled with bouts of hard times.

So Saturday, after a few longs nights and hours of heavy contemplation, I packed up my stuff and left.  I needed to get out of my home town - away from some feelings that I've been struggling to overcome.  I had made a call that day to a guy whose number and add I found on Craigslist.  The add said that their was a room for rent near the beach in Florida.  I was sold.  I arrived on Sunday night after a total of about 18 hours of driving. 

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The clock hits 2:58 a.m.; it’s very early and dark this Thursday morning. I ask myself, “What in the F am I doing?” I’m wondering around the apartment with no lights on, nothing, not even the smallest of lights is on. I’m contemplating a lot right now. I had one of those days where I felt very alone. It’s not even all diabetes related, although, actually as I think about it even more I realize it all probably comes back to that.
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pixel packing mama

Just the other day I was speaking with a group of co-workers about different life changing events in the life of someone with diabetes. As we sat there and talked about it I began to reflect on my own. I thought about the different times in my life such as diagnosis time, school, relationships, complications, and work. All things that every person living with diabetes can relate to, or will eventually deal with.

Where were you when you were diagnosed? What were you doing that day or at that particular time in your life? Were you at work? Were you at school? Did you go into a coma or diabetic ketoacidosis? Was your vision so blurry, that like me, you realized you couldn't see the picture on the t.v.?
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