Since I changed my endocrinilogist last year, I've really been happy with my experiences with Dr. K. She's the kind of doctor that means business but doesn't come off as if she's judging you. She tells you what she thinks, but leaves it up to you what to do. So usually, I'm fairly excited (yes, I said excited) about going to see her. Even when I know I've been doing 85% of things wrong.

This appointment didn't feel that way though. I just really didn't want to have to go. I've been making some changes and my averages are down. I didn't want to hear that I'd been doing this and this wrong, even if she does leave off the judgement. I just wasn't willing to expose all those mistakes to the light.

And I feel torn between wishing I would have canceled and being excited about the outcome.

  (READ MORE)

2 weeks ago

I could hear the laughter from the comedy club in the distance, echoing through the basement corridors. The comedian’s muffled words reverberated from his microphone and the crowd roared in response. I could hear the dampened jokes as if they were being delivered from the other end of a tunnel, but for the life of me, I couldn’t find the comedy club. I felt like I was walking around in circles for hours and I hadn’t seen a soul.

Finally, an elevator opened up. I attempted to step in but people were packed in like sardines. There was no room for me.

Odd dream.

  (READ MORE)

Once a year my company offers health screenings -- free -- and an incentive (such as a gift card) for taking the health screening. I think it's a great idea for companies to do this because there are plenty of stories about people who don't go to the doctor enough and then go through a health screening at work and discover that they have diabetes or high cholesterol or that they're this close to having a heart attack.

That's great. But I don't participate mainly because I already know what's going on with me. I see my OB once a year, I see my primary once a year, and I see my endo every three months complete with blood work. There is nothing that a health screening can tell me that I don't already know. In fact, it would likely do nothing more than piss me off because someone with little knowledge of diabetes would be telling me that I test too much or questioning the validity of a CGM.

  (READ MORE)

Whatever it was, it's gone now. But for the last four days I've wondered everything from a bad site to bad insulin to hormones to a virus and everything in between.

It started overnight Wednesday (I think) when i was in the upper 300s for no reason. I went over dinner in my head over and over to make sure I hadn't missed anything. While I had had mostly good numbers with that site, I considered that it had gone bad or that I was beginning to need to change my sites more often.

But after changing my site on Thursday I continued to have horrible blood sugars, and was certain I had a bad site. With my recent experience with worn out sites  -- shooting up the second I start eating something, spiking high and low -- I thought I might have gotten an old site.

  (READ MORE)

I'm really irritated with my weight lately. I've gained over five pounds back from the twenty that I worked so hard to lose last year. It all started after my endometriosis surgery and the start of Accutane.

For one, my surgery got me out of my incredibly strict habits of running and working out. I had to take time off to recover. And once that recovery was over, I just couldn't get back into it. I missed it. I missed the way my body felt, but there were bigger things stopping me.

The Accutane was the biggest hindrance. There was the fatigue. There was the joint pain, then the back pain. Then the headaches. One thing fell on top of another and working out was the last thing on my mind.

  (READ MORE)

I'm really excited to share this blog with the whole wide world out there. It's been an insanely long time since I've seen decent blood sugar results last for more than a few hours. Overdue kind of long. So long that I was feeling like it might just never happen. But these past 24+ hours have proved otherwise...so I'm rejoicing with you.

Wednesday 8:30pm: I'm about two hours post meal and my blood sugar clocks in at 90. Italian food...amazing.

9:40pm: 114. That's without treating the 90 and just letting the Italian absorb in my system. Rejoice.

11pm: A small yogurt. No bolus.

Thursday 12am: 152. I cut my Lantus down by one unit for a 16 unit injection. I'm in the okay range for sleep, but with patterns like today, I'm not entirely comfortable.

  (READ MORE)