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Life is full of simple pleasures.
Today I slept in until 12. I made some coffee. I drank about 4 cups. I had a nice little breakfast. I turned on the tv and actually caught a decent movie. The movie was, "The Broken Trail" with Robert Duval. It was about some good ol' cowboys taking some horses about 800 miles or so through some
beautiful country in Wyoming. The movie really hit home with me this morning. I love to be outside. I love that I am country guy and that I am in my element when I am out in the wilderness. I love a good fire and a good meal. Sometimes I am happiest with just a cup of coffee and maybe a smoke if I feel like it.
Bottom line is today I was depressed.
I had a nice breakfast, watched that great movie, drank my coffee, and then tested my sugar.
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I think Mousie nailed it in her comment from my last post. The age of 6 really is shaping up to be a time of new understanding. And yes, Charlie is clearly dealing with diabetes on a new level.
These days he's showing signs of wanting more control. He now loads the test strip into the meter, though he's not ready to test himself yet. He's also started reading labels for total carbs. A tug of war over a bag of crackers usually ensues when I try to make sure he's right about the carbs before I enter it into the pump. He's getting frustrated.
Charlie: Can I eat now?
Me: (pulling) I just want to check the carbs!
Charlie: (pulling) I told you! 16 carbs!
Me: (pulling) I. Just. Want. To. See. The.
Me: Shit!
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Thanks to En Vogue for those lyrics. We got back from vacation late Friday night but I'm still feeling my way back to my "new normal".
10 days in New Mexico in a travel trailer with kids (ages 4 & 1) - it went really well! Yes, that's shock you see in my punctuation! We went places and saw people and ran, ran, ran. The weather was beautiful, highs hovering around 80. They have gotten a lot of rain and some Dolly-effect flooding this summer, so it was quite lush by New Mexico standards.
Unfortunately, I didn't replace my workouts as I had hoped I would. Read that as "hoped, but didn't make definite plans for ahead of time." I need to remember that for the future. On the plus side, I was much more active than usual.
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First off, let me say that in my
New Year's Eve post, I said
IF I were going to make resolutions, those would be mine! I gave myself an out already!
I could keep this information to myself but I know it will only fester. I would then feel the need to lie about my health plans, etc, etc. In the interests of
dieting naked, I will be honest.
I have gained 10 pounds from my lowest weight of 2007, last seen at the end of October.
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A while back I wrote a post called
"My Own Routine." It talked about how traditional exercise does not work well for me. I have to find different ways that do not feel like
exercise but still fulfil the need.
Racquetball has been my main source of exercise over the past few months. I love to play but since I have lost a little weight I find I cannot figure out where my BG should be before I start and how much I should change my
basal rate on my pump. Last night was racquetball night and thankfully the very first time I made it through the entire game without going low.
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Not long after I wrote
this post about a news story that called bariatric surgery a "cure" for type 2 diabetes, a friend of mine emailed to ask about one of the comments. A reader suggested that there will never be a cure for diabetes because the disease is a money maker.
I explained to my friend that the multi-billion-dollar industry makes a profit in so many areas: test strips, meters, oral drugs, insulin, pumps, syringes, even accessories. What motivation is there, I asked her, for the world to come up with a cure and put all those good people out of work.
I may be naive and woefully open minded, but I am not a pessimist; I believe there are good doctors and researchers out there who are not motivated by money.
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Did you catch the Style network's new reality show? The 9 episode series is about a 487 lb Southern belle with type 2 diabetes who's been warned she's a "metabolic time bomb". You can see the first one here, if you missed it.
The show didn't discuss her diabetes in depth, the doctor just mentioned that she wasn't able to control her blood sugars. Ruby repeated something else later that her doctor had said. It compared high sugars with turning your blood to syrup and how that syrup damages the kidneys, the eyes, et al. That image of blood as syrup has stuck with me.
It's mentioned a couple times that Ruby has weighed over 700 lbs sometime in the past. I'll be interested to hear how she lost 200+ lbs already. She seems very motivated by the numerous threats to her health. I think the series is Tivo-worthy.
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A funny thing happened this week. I turned forty.
Okay, perhaps it wasn't so funny.
The morning of my birthday, I took a long moment in front of my bathroom mirror. My apartment complex management was kind enough to replace the subtle lighting over the mirror that we'd had for two years with new, direct lights that look fancy but which might be more appropriate for an interrogation than the gentle transition from being asleep to facing the reality of my new life as a forty-something. Looking in the mirror, I swear I could hear the faint creaking sound of my bones as they calcified.
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A funny thing happened this week. I turned forty.
Okay, perhaps it wasn't so funny.
The morning of my birthday, I took a long moment in front of my bathroom mirror. My apartment complex management was kind enough to replace the subtle lighting over the mirror that we'd had for two years with new, direct lights that look fancy but which might be more appropriate for an interrogation than the gentle transition from being asleep to facing the reality of my new life as a forty-something. Looking in the mirror, I swear I could hear the faint creaking sound of my bones as they calcified.
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"This," I said to my mom while pointing to the table full of mid-afternoon party food, "is exactly the kind of situation where I would really
benefit from having a pump."
We were in my brother's dining room at his daughter's first-birthday party. The spread included crackers with an amazing cream cheese and pesto dip, mini chicken salad croissant sandwiches, fresh fruit, potato chips and dip and fresh veggies. To the untrained eye, there wasn't much that I should have stayed away from, but in reality there was just about nothing that didn't require insulin.
Mom looked a little confused. "But you'd still have to count carbs," she said.
"Well, yeah, of course," I said. "But that's not really the reason the pump would be so beneficial. I could eat and not have to excuse myself to take a shot."
She nodded in understanding.
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