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Every one of us with diabetes hears that clock ticking away.

Glucose, insulin, ketones, tests.
The endless cycle never rests.
Fail once to heed the daily strife
And that day you may lose your life.

Alarmists are everywhere. Family, friends, strangers, all with the best of intentions.

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I'm a self-proclaimed adventurer. I love to try new things, go to all sorts of places, and I'm always up for a challenge. So college seemed like it'd be one huge adventure in life. But three years ago, I sat down to apply to colleges and had no idea as to what I wanted. Plus there was one major issue looming over me: my health.

I've always known that diabetes would keep me a little more cautious than most. But I've never let it stop me. I played sports, I took trips, I even went zip-lining through the jungle last year. Diabetes means that I plan much more than the average person, that I don't just pick up and leave without extreme consideration. I never thought it would hold me back.

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My vacation was extremely nice. My mom and I spent several days with her family (who I haven't seen in several years), then trekked to New York City (my favorite place in the entire world). And mostly, my diabetes played nice. Nothing too out of the ordinary and no insane highs. Just plenty of hypo unawareness that left me annoyed, but thankful that I'm vigilant.

Now that I'm getting back into the grind of "normalcy," I'm kind of in a funk. There's a lot looming in my mind at the moment about my life, my health, and my future. And those things are weighing heavily into my diabetes world...causing me to forget insulin or blood sugar checks or to eat on a schedule.

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I've had quite a few decent numbers since I've started the whole Lantus switch from the pump. Wednesday was a bit rocky, as well as the first part of Thursday. But by two PM on Thursday, I was seeing stable levels close to range. It hasn't been completely stable or all that easy, but it's been comforting to already see numbers like 120 pop up on the meter screen.

Getting the night numbers to cooperate has been a bit challenging. For Friday morning, I woke up at 171 after 16 units of Lantus the night before. But Saturday morning, I woke up at 66 after 16 units of Lantus the previous night. Last night, I did 17 units of Lantus at 10PM, dropped to 69 at 3AM, but woke up at a nice round 110. So obviously, I need tweaking.

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Every day with diabetes is a little different from the last. There are ups and downs. There are good days, bad days, and something in between. I never know what diabetes will toss my way. I never know when it will knock me to the ground or give me the strength to rise above the ashes.

Today was a fairly normal day, with a few diabetes kinks. So I decided to track a day with my diabetes...to show the world what it's really like inside these walls.

11:25am: Oversleeping is the enemy right now. And my blood sugar starts out high at 160. I'll take that over another low like last night though (a sneaky 57 that left me with no symptoms at all).

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I’m generally not a jealous person (at least I don’t think so), but “jealousy” is the only way I think I can describe what I’m going through right now.

Every time I see an ad for the breast cancer three-day walk — which is about every 30 seconds these days — I want to hurl the TV across the room. Why? Because why can’t that much attention be paid to people with diabetes?

Yes, I know there are walks for diabetes. But are there commercials with people dressed in blue saying “Save the ta-tas”… er, “Save the pancreases of the world” and “If I can walk 20 miles a day in support of my mother/sister/aunt/uncle/son/daughter then anyone can?” No, there aren’t.

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I went to get the mail today and found a package from Minimed. It wasn't the normal size box for Olivia's pump supplies and we've already received our Care Link doo-hickey (technical term, that - doohickey. The whatsit that you download pump info from. I think. I haven't actually used it yet. I keep forgetting....)

Anyway, inside the box was a brand new One Touch Ultra that beams blood sugar readings directly to Olivia's pump. Yay! I was all happy. I thought it would be great, that Olivia wouldn't forget about putting her blood sugars in, since the meter would do it for her.

Oh, how wrong I was. I gave it to her, all eager to see her reaction, since when the BD meter went away, she was very upset. But no.

"It's not green!" she exclaimed. "And it's not tiny." And she sort of flung it aside, sighing in exasperation.

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