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February 10th, 2012
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Many of us have been a-twitter about World Diabetes Day, bringing attention to the epidemic proportions of Type 1 and Type 2 diabetes and the Big Blue Test. Seattle had a bike ride as did Victoria, BC. Philadelphia had an event at the Temple University School of Podiatric Medicine. Those of us in the New York City area celebrated with a huge D-Meetup and pizza party. The indefatiguable Allison set things up in a Midtown office building. At its peak, over 20 Type 1s, Type 2s, and Type 3s gathered to enjoy each other's company and take part in the Big Blue Test.

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I'm a type 1 insulin dependent diabetic. I have been since I was 4 years old. I also have polycystic ovarian syndrome (PCOS for short)...along with endometriosis if you really want to get detailed. The PCOS didn't pop up until 2006 when things progressively got worse.

 

Sudden weight gain, mood swings, fatigue, pelvic pain, very irregular periods, acne, male patterned hair growth, hair thinning, ovarian cysts, and increasingly difficult blood sugar swings.

 

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Since I've been back home, I've had both the time and energy to start exercising again. Motivation is another story, but I think I'm doing fairly well. My mom and I are walking a lot of nights. And lately, I've taken up biking when she doesn't want to walk.

 

The scale hasn't budged much, except that I did drop some water weight and an extra pound since moving back home. That's also due to the better eating, better sleeping, and general situation. But it's still nice to see when the scale weighs in closer to my goal. I'm only 2 pounds from "happy" and 7 pounds from "perfect."

 

The interesting part is the blood sugars. Last night, I biked for the first time in a long while. I only made it about 20 minutes before I decided to head home, but that 20 minutes kicked me hard. I got home, collapsed on the cold tile, and just let the A/C wash over me. I was definitely feeling the extent of the bike ride.

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Things have been busy lately. And they are about to get even busier. I've been working on the scrapbook from my Europe trip. I'm still applying for jobs and researching my move. Plus I've had the odds and ends of having a life, a family, and friends...like my brother buying his first house, my best friend leaving for 5 weeks, and helping my mom with a volunteer case.

 

So once again, it's one of those times that I've let diabetes slide into the backseat unnoticed. Instead of sitting down with my logbook and actually recalling the details, I'm guilt-ridden when I glance at it. I'm not even sure what kind of insulin to carb ratio I'm using. It was supposed to be 1:8 and maybe I've done that but I just can't seem to recall. My brain is just not in diabetes mode.

 

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It doesn't happen very often, but occasionally my subconscious decides to connect with reality. I'm talking about dreaming. And lows.

 

This morning, I was in the middle of another bizarre dream. I've had several nightmares lately so this dream was a small relief compared to the horror stories going on in my sleep. Marvin and I were driving in an unknown city attempting to get into a parking garage. For some reason, we'd stopped in the middle of the road.

 

Next I know, there is a car rammed into the back of ours. Suddenly, I was low in my dream. My stomach had that butterfly feeling. I pulled out my meter and checked even amidst the car accident. According to my dream, I was only 120.

 

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As January comes to a close, there is a lot going on inside of me. Like usual. This time around, I'm hoping that February will bring some better days. Especially in the diabetes realm.

 

Lately, I am struggling with all sorts of highs. Persistent, unexplained, torrential highs. It's new territory for me too. I've always been prone to lows. Now I don't think I'd know what to do if I actually was low.

 

The highs have been around for a month or two. I've tried moving and increasing the Lantus, switching injection sites, adding in exercise, taking out certain foods, and so much more. But nothing seems to help.

 

It's exactly why I started the Metformin on Wednesday. And for a day, I saw slightly lower numbers. Then they jumped right back up and stayed there.

 

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I've always been prone to nasty headaches. Ever since I can remember, I've gotten migraines and headaches that just would not go away. In high school, I had an MRI and several other tests done to rule out any conditions that might be causing them. I had another MRI several years later to double check since the headaches never went away.

 

Because of my other health conditions, there was a time that I was really paying attention to these types of things. I soon realized that my headaches seemed to have a few specific causes. One was hormonal, which has been alleviated to none or one headache per month thanks to the birth control pill. Second was blood sugars. And third was tension headaches.

 

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When the lows hit last week, I was frustrated. I'm desperately trying to lose weight and get my blood sugars in range without dropping to one extreme or soaring to another. So I lowered my insulin by one unit. The Lantus at least. Humalog stayed the same.

 

I've been pretty consistent with walking every day or at least every other day. I'm also using the hand weights and just generally trying to stay more active (taking the stairs when possible, not parking super close to the store/office, etc). My food intake has stayed the same where I eat a normal breakfast, a low carb/calorie lunch, and usually a normal dinner. I try to make healthy choices on a regular basis, but I do splip on occasion.

 

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It's dblog day here in the diabetes blogosphere. The web is alive with exciting variations of "Six things you want people to know about diabetes." And I'm joining in this dblog day (it also happens to be my birthday) with my own variation of these six things. Six things I want you to know about MY diabetes.

 

I can talk all day about the facts of diabetes and overcome myths and point out the truth of this disease. But there's a big difference between telling you all the facts of diabetes (like the difference between type 1 and type 2) and telling you what my diabetes is actually like. My diabetes is not your diabetes or the diabetic sitting next to you at work. We are all different and each have our own things that pertain to our unique situations.

 

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Today's dblog week post is supposed to center around 10 things I hate about diabetes.  I've decided to offer 10 things - and then some counterpoints. 

 

To me, it's pointless to list all the things I hate, without also thinking about the things that diabetes gives me. 

 

Here goes...

 

1) Point:  I hate that diabetes creates fear.  Some days, I worry about complications.  Some days, I worry about how diabetes might effect my performance in relationships, at work, in life.  I hate that I worry over food and insulin. 

 

Counterpoint: Without diabetes to worry about, I probably wouldn't eat nearly as well as I do.  I would be a cupcake glutton instead of a lover of greens and fresh food.  Of this I'm almost certain.  I just with diabetes didn't use fear to keep me on the right track.

 

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Carey Potash
Carey PotashCarey is a full-time hater of diabetes. The benefits stink. His 7-year-old son, Charlie, has been giving he and his wife the finger since November of 2003. Carey's parenting humor has appeared in various websites and print magazines. He resides in the suburbs of Philadelphia with his wife and three children. (Read More)
Michelle Kowalski
Michelle KowalskiMichelle Kowalski, a writer, editor and photography hobbiest living in Phoenix, was diagnosed with Type 2 diabetes in February 2005. In January 2008, as part of her quest to start on an insulin pump, Michelle learned that she actually has type 1 diabetes. (Read More)
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