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February 10th, 2012
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Over the weekend, I had a low blood sugar in the middle of the night that left me feeling like I had been beaten soundly and left in a ditch. (Covered in petrol, a la Eddie Izzard.)
It was a strange experience, though, because the "low hangover" feeling was neatly accompanied by a feeling of guilt. This low wasn't one that came out of no where and smacked up upside the head. This low was the result of a miscalculation while I was at dinner. (READ MORE)


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I have a love relationship with my insulin. Every diffused dose I have taken over the years found its way into my system with appreciation, even if it stung like the bejesus at times. Like an addict, the smooth emptying of a syringe or cannula gives me immediate comfort, and I know that my body is staying up to date on its hormonal needs. I know the energy I consume can go to work and my internal hemoglobic labyrinth is not under any stress. (READ MORE)


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Sometimes I think it's really hard to separate my life from my diabetes. I've been diabetic since before I can even remember so life has always involved this disease. Now that I'm over sixteen years in, it makes the separation even more difficult. How can I cut out the one part of my life that takes over every second of every day?

 

There was a time when that was easier. A time when I didn't follow every action or thought with something diabetes related. A time where most people didn't know that I was diabetic or see the results of my diabetes in my life. But sadly, that was a time with little control. It's a stage that I went through that I don't want to go back to.

 

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Have you had a chance to catch up with your favorite Blogabetes bloggers? Here's another edition of "In Case You Missed It."
Don't miss Andy Bell's poignant and honest "I'll Have a #3 With a Side of I Don't Care." He writes about life revolving around food, which is an issue all PWD's can relate to on some level.
Nicole Purcell hits us up with another gorgeous and introspective piece on the effects of the diabetes online community with "Community." A must-read. (READ MORE)


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Maybe I can clear this up; maybe not everyone will understand exactly what I am trying to say.  In writing about something, or your feelings, sometimes it is very hard to convey a message.  You can have the truest intentions, and still, the precise message in which you wish to share can be misconstrued or lost completely. 

 

Where you’re at or how you feel about something when you read it can be absolutely different than another person sees it or what the original writer was attempting to say in the first place. 

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As I was driving home from my dad's last night, Olivia and I started talking about her dad. He's not exactly a role model-type guy and they've had a very rocky relationship for the last two plus years.

The conversation started off discussing my concerns about The Bug and Olivia commented that she didn't think the other girls could get diabetes since it didn't run in the family. I said that we didn't know that, given that her father's side of the family has an obsession with hiding the facts. After a brief discussion of her grandfather's parentage and the fact that most of his family, and her grandmother's, for that matter, were still in Ireland, she told me that a comment her dad made years ago had stuck with her for a long time.
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It’s been one of those days, the type of day where you just want to get some things off your chest (or mind). I wrote my last blog about television. I said some strong things; I got out some strong feelings. But they were heartfelt at the time, and looking back, I still feel strongly about what I said. TV sucks. It’s not natural. Their are a few things on occasion that are worth watching; sometimes you can catch something on that is educational or good for the soul. TV CAN be used as a good medium, or tool for our health. Sometimes, you see something you connect with or that gets you fired up, but in a good way. Tonight, for example, I watched a documentary on Netflix called, “Mario’s Story.”

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I don't often think about how much mental energy I put into tamping down the thoughts that run thru my head about Olivia and how her diabetes affects her. I do bury those feelings because it makes me sad and angry and worried and a whole host of other, not-so-pleasant feelings and I just can't walk around all day feeling that way - it's too draining. Instead, I concentrate on working with her, figuring out how to handle the myriad situations that crop up every day without dwelling on the ramifications of the disease too much. I'll let myself touch lightly on it daily, but wearing all those concerns on my sleeve would send me to the nut house. Every so often, though,something will burst that dam and I'll sit down and have a good old cry about it.  This morning was one of those days. 

 

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It dawned on my recently that I completely missed my diagnosis anniversary. It is not like I throw a glucose filled party or anything but I like to recognize "another year, still here" kind of mentality.
But I missed it! I was kind of upset about this since it makes for a good blog post (LOL) but maybe it is not what I was supposed to be thinking about. Diabetes is on my mind constantly and forgetting something like my anniversary is really not that big of a deal.
Not only that but I always feel like it is and it isn't something to shout about. Sure I have made it another year but when I give diabetes all this power and attention it seems like it is getting the best of me in a way. I know some of you will disagree and I would love to hear how your diagnosis anniversaries go for you. (READ MORE)


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It might help if you read this when you're mad! Reading this may also cause you great relief! (It did for me). I cried when I wrote it. I laughed hysterically. I also edited out the bad words that I would have normally said, just so kids and mom's could still read it! This one felt great! Oh, and you may want to punch something when your done too. I DID!

Diabetes, (READ MORE)


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Michelle Kowalski
Michelle KowalskiMichelle Kowalski, a writer, editor and photography hobbiest living in Phoenix, was diagnosed with Type 2 diabetes in February 2005. In January 2008, as part of her quest to start on an insulin pump, Michelle learned that she actually has type 1 diabetes. (Read More)
Kerri Sparling
Kerri SparlingKerri Sparling, diagnosed with type 1 diabetes when she was six years old, doesn't let diabetes define her. It just helps explain some things.
Creator of the diabetes blog Six Until Me and an editor for dLife, Kerri is an awareness advocate and an active member of the diabetes community. She'd also like a kitten.
(Read More)
Our Other Bloggers: Brenda Bell, Nicole Purcell, Carey Potash, Lindsey Guerin, Megan, MikeDurbin, Robert Hudson, Julia, George Simmons, Scott Marvel, Kim Doty,