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One of the ways I break up my day is to frequently check in with my sisters at Diabetic Mommy. This morning I posted a question on the message board that has gotten me thinking lately.
I wanted to know how much everyone spends on groceries on a weekly basis. For our family of five, I spend an average of $200 a week on food, toiletries and other incidentals. Basically, anything I can pick up at WalMart. Our budget, though, needs some tweaking and there are few things left to adjust besides our grocery bill. (READ MORE)

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This morning, I have the heat up and a fire burning. I'm attempting to take this third "snow/ice day" to get some of my own work done. Papers, research, and taxes. I also have to handle a stolen paycheck at some point (although I don't think the roads will let me get very far today and that requires a trip to the police station).

 

This cold weather does not motivate me to do much. Especially things that require running around town like picking up school books, going to that police station, and getting decent groceries. But even inside, I'd rather just curl up under my covers and watch TV.

 

There are things on my lists that I have to do though. I have to pay bills and handle some odd charges on my internet bill. I have to pay my taxes at some point (thanks, Uncle Sam). I also have to decide what my living situation is going to look like in the near future.

 

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It's hard to believe that we are already a week into the New Year. I feel like I haven't accomplished anything for being one week closer to 2010. I finally made my resolutions last night, but haven't taken any steps to obtaining them. Despite my laziness, here they are:

 

1) Exercise more: I'm starting out with walking/jogging two days a week, specifically Mondays and Wednesdays since things are slower paced then. I want to build up to three, four, and five times a week, but I don't want to overload myself.

 

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My mind is currently in a million places at the moment. I'm in the middle of a tough decision and waiting game. I'm slightly stressed. And I'm closely watching how my Lantus change is affecting my numbers. So I'm going to take the easy way out and bullet point what's on my mind.

 

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Time and distance have also served to blunt not just periods of psychological distress, but also some of the everyday things I used to savor before.

 

As in, before I was diagnosed with diabetes.

 

Before I had diabetes, I didn't have to worry about eating a hamburger, pizza, Fettuccini Alfredo, or my favorite restaurant "cajun pasta" dishes. Now, any version I make at home is significantly modified to eliminate refined flours, reduce fats, and raise the vegetable count. You can hardly find the pasta in any of my "pasta" dishes.

 

Before I had diabetes, breakfast was a pint of orange juice and a bagel with cream cheese. Now, bagels are eaten in parts, and orange juice is a special-occasion item: a quarter bagel is one carbohydrate exchange, and a cup of orange juice is a huge portion of the daily calorie count.

 

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With a new year come new ideas, new resolutions, new solutions to old problems, and of course new problems needing solutions.

 

Among the last is, once again, need for a full-time job. Cell phone sales were not high enough to keep me on until Christmas, so I am once again navigating the waters of unemployment and job-search.

 

For now, enough of that. The meme going around the Diabetes Online Community has been that of "spreading the word" -- both telling people with diabetes of the online resources available to us, and bringing our online activism out to the world in which we live, visit our doctors, purchase our food and medications, and educate our children. While most of us talk about outreach in terms of getting our real-life neighbors to hook up with our online resources, I see a different reality.

 

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I got a bit of flak from a number of folk in the type 1 community for juxtaposing the You Can Do This project with the "you CAN eat this if you have diabetes" mentality of, well, many of the same folk. The issue is, the same folk who are, on the one hand, encouraging us to test and inject and correct are the folk who are talking about Food Police and Diabetes Police and how we, as people with diabetes, have to fight against those stereotypes by -- well, by eating all those things we should never touch with a ten-foot-pole.

 

This may work for people with type 1 diabetes, but it can be deadly for those of us with type 2.

 

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I spent the better part of this week looking at apartment complexes, meeting with a potential graduate program, and learning more about the city that I'm moving to. I also went on a job interview and got lost a lot. My blood sugars stayed pretty decent throughout the stress and chaos, except for one bad high after a chocolate shake and a nasty low after Mexican food.

 

Each time I take a trip to where I'm moving, I get more and more excited. This time I really got to see where I might be living, envisioning myself driving those roads and shopping at the grocery stores. I'm still freaking out inside, wondering if this is the right decision for me. But despite the fear, I still know that I'm doing what's best for me right now and that I'm keeping my health as my priority.

 

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Sometimes I wonder why I moved four hours away from my family and friends. Sometimes the nights are tough, long, and sleepless. Sometimes I'm homesick and in need of a nice girls' night with my best friends.

 

Every time that happens, I think of two things: what made me move and what it'd be like to move back. The first is easy. I had multiple factors pushing me away from home and into a new adventure. I wanted to try something different, move away from the city that I'd always known and away from the instant network of friends and family. I wanted a good graduate program that I didn't have to wait months to attend. I wanted to be close to Marvin.

 

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With a new job comes a lot of new policies, procedures, and information. Benefits not withstanding. For instance, I get quite a few vacation, sick, and personal days with my job. I also get compensation time and some other odds and ends. But the big one for me is health insurance.

 

Right now, I'm covered on my parent's plan through Cigna. I previously had Blue Cross Blue Shield and absolutely loved it. They were great about paying for things (except for that one tricky situation back in 2007) and the copays were reasonable. Earlier this year, we changed to Cigna though. And everything went through the roof. My recent prescriptions cost me $364 for a 3 month supply of glucagon, Humalog, Lantus, and Metformin. It's outrageous to me that my prescription costs went up by roughly $150. Not to mention how much my doctor's visits copays have increased.

 

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