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How does it happen that life gets in the way of taking proper care of my diabetes?
How does it happen that I can log faithfully - bloodsugars, food, activity, dosing - for months - and then - poof! (or more like thud!) - I just fall off the wagon?
How?
Well. I guess real life happens.
Last spring, I rededicated myself to my health and well-being. I got into an exercise routine, I altered my eating habits, I committed to testing AND logging so that I could control my diabetes more effectively. And, on a whole, these efforts paid off. I lost about 50 lbs in a little over a year. I improved my A1C. I found myself with more energy and more stamina. I actually started enjoying eating well, packing a lunch and taking in ample servings of fruits and vegetables.
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I was diagnosed with type 1 diabetes twenty-five years ago. Twenty-five years is a long time to live with something. It is an especially long time to live with something that requires tight control. Twenty-five years is enough time to have seen lots of bad days, lots of good days, and lots and lots of in betweens. And it is enough time for me to have had the good fortune of seeing vast improvements in access to information and treatment, developments and improvements in technology and even some improvements in (GASP!) what health insurers are willing to cover.
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My last endo appointment in May of this year brought lots of good news. An A1C of 6.0, a reduction in my total and bad cholesterol levels, kidney function excellent. Overall, I felt pretty good leaving the office. But there were issues to be addressed - aren't there always? First, although my cholesterol levels were reduced, they were still not where the doctor - and where I - would like to have them. Further, I'd gained 2lbs since my previous visit.
So, I set my mind to fixing these issues, while maintaining all of the good stuff that I'd managed to achieve and then I started making some changes.
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Blah, blah, blah, here she goes again, pissing and moaning about logging.
Back when the year was shiny and new, as opposed to snow-covered and grubby (and enough with the snow already, ok? I'm SICK of it. Sick.) I resolved to be more diligent about logging Olivia's blood sugars. And for a few weeks I was. And then I forgot for a couple of days. And then it was Thursday and I thought, well, I'll just start over on Monday. And I forgot again.
I've logged in fits and starts over the last 2 months, but mostly, I haven't logged at all. And now she has an endo appointment tomorrow and I'm not going to have that much information to give her and I'm pissed at myself.
I just don't know how to make myself log. I forget. And if I'm forgetting to log, how am I supposed to teach Olivia? I'm not setting a good example at all and they always tell you (who are they anyway?) that you should lead by example when it comes to your kids.
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