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I really don't like going to the doctor. The endocrinologist to be specific. Every time I go, I just seem to leave disappointed. Sometimes it's less disappointment than others. Sometimes I'm just so angry at myself and at this disease. Sometimes I cry. Sometimes I get mad at the doctor (because OF COURSE, it's HIS fault I'm diabetic!). But mostly, the doctor just makes me feel alone in what I feel.
Today I had an endo appointment (if you didn't already guess). My last A1c was 6.9, my lowest ever. I was absolutely thrilled at that number, yet the perfectionist in me still wanted lower. And I honestly tried for lower (less in the last month or so though). But life got in the way.
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Twice this week I've literally said "Oh crap! That's
this week? Once was for a birthday party for No. 1 and once was the realization that my next endo appointment is Tuesday.
I'm feeling rather confident going into this appointment. OK, actually I think I'm being a little too cocky. I sort of feel like my A1C is going to be the most amazing drop from a 9 that anyone has ever seen just because I've started walking more and the Novolog is really, really helping my numbers. And I know this because I'm actually testing more than once or twice a day. I need to sort of bring myself down to size, but I really doubt that will happen until I get the results of my A1C test.
In the time that I saw Dr. C last, I have started and stopped Byetta, developed terrible TERRIBLE seasonal allergies that a steroid shot didn't even touch, started nasal allergy medicines, found myself walking at least five days a week, and rather enjoying the control I seem to have taking Novolog.
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On average, I test seven times a day. It can range from five to twelve, depending on activity, emotions, symptoms, and my memory.
Today, I've already tested four times and I'm only half way through the day. Yesterday, I tested nine times. The day before, I tested eight.
Obviously, I go through bottles of strips quickly. Twenty-five to a container doesn't make it very far. Sometimes two days, sometimes four.
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Last week I wrote about my experience with my new endo. Today marks a week from that first visit and the day I am supposed to fax over a weeks worth of BG readings and boluses from my pump.
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After fighting lows on Glyburide
last week, my doctor suggested trying
just diet and exercise again. I thought he was crazy, it hasn't worked the last two times that I tried it, so why should it work this time. He gave it 80-percent odds of working. I jokingly asked if he wanted to put a friendly wager on it. I'm glad I didn't.
I am amazed to report that after one week without any anti-diabetes medication, my blood sugar had remained pretty normal for the most part. Granted, I'm only testing before meals, but still 90 percent of those readings have been under or close to 100. The one or two higher numbers I had were the result of a very bad night's sleep with a teething boy. Everything else, even bedtime numbers, was right in range.
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I haven't made it a full week without insulin and things are looking pretty scary already. But I'm
humoring my doctor and playing along with this little experiement. The sad part is, I'm not even taking post-meal readings, just fasting, premeal and bedtime. And the results are, to me at least, unacceptable.
I really don't like having high blood sugar. It's not just seeing high numbers on the meter that bothers me. It's the little things, like the
insatiable hunger and thirst, the fatigue and blurry vision. I don't know how high blood sugar has to be before it affects your vision, but it seems lately, my sight is fuzzy again, especially in the evenings. Really annoying because I want to get new glasses, but I need my vision to be stable before making that kind of investment.
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I've gotten into the habit lately of bolusing for a meal more toward the middle or the end instead of before. It depends on a number of factors, including what and when I ate last, what I'm getting ready to eat, and what my pre-meal blood sugar is. This mid-meal bolus stems from several instances when I've either gone low or started to go low before I even finish eating. It's pretty unnerving to feel a low so close to a meal.
Like today, for example. I tested at 130 not long before we headed downstairs to eat lunch. Since there are few tables for the amount of people who typically choose to eat lunch in the lobby, I went ahead of the microwave-users to secure a place for the five of us.
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Since becoming a "Weight Watcher," I have noticed the amount of stress in my life has increased. Having diabetes means I carry around a bunch of stuff with me where ever I go. I have my
Glucose testing machine, strips, lancets, glucose tabs, and not to mention my carb counting book.
And now I have to add my Dining Out Guide which gives me the point values to restaurant food, my sliding scale for figuring point values, my tracker which I log my points in, and the Food Guide that has point values for all kinds of foods. So you see, I have more stuff to remember these days then I did before.
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Listen, people! The FDL (Fantasy Diabetes League) is for real! Sure, it had some trouble finding its footing in the early days of this inaugural season, but I assure you, one lucky winner will walk away with a $10 Starbucks gift card and better yet, an original drawing by Charlie of a giant squid urinating on a scuba diver. Throw a frame on it and it's perfect for the guest bathroom or the baby's nursery.
The gist is simple. Receive absurd comments related to diabetes and earn points. For more on the rules of The FDL, click
here.
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I had an endo appointment this week that was pretty uneventful.
We went over my blood work and everything looked good except for my a1c of course. I pretty much accepted that it would not be great since my blood sugars have been high and it was only a month ago that rang in with an a1c of 8.3.
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