Abizeleth

I don't expect everyone I've ever met to remember that I'm diabetic. There was a period that I barely told anyone about it, unless I was absolutely forced to. So how could they remember if they never knew?

I do expect my close friends, family and important people (i.e. my coworkers, my professors, etc) to remember that I'm diabetic. After all, most of them see the daily battle that diabetes is. How can you forget that?

But so often, my friends forget. Sometimes I feel like my own family forgets. They get involved in their own lives, their own problems and forget about this portion of my life. Yet, I can't excuse them.

A question was posed to one of my closest friends (I've known this person for over three years now), asking "Do you know anyone with a chronic or serious illness?" They replied with a hasty "No, don't think so." I didn't say a word, but inside I was thinking "Did you forget about me? Did you forget about my chronic illness, my serious illness?" The simple and harsh reality is yes. They had forgotten the daily fight with diabetes in my life because it is so constant in my life.

Another friend of mine (not so close, so I'll excuse him) gave me the strangest look the other day. We went bowling. I started shaking and held out my hand for him to see. He said "What's wrong?" My reply: "I'm low." He looked so confused, so puzzled. "Low? Is that a new term? Like high, low." I gently reminded him that I am diabetic. And the conversation ended, leaving me with the feeling that diabetes is too much of a silent disease.

Just the other day, I was talking with a very good friend of mine about something I didn't feel I could do alone because of my diabetes (yes, I'm one of the people who believes diabetes does limit me). I didn't mention the diabetes, just simply that I couldn't do the activity. We had discussed it previously, so I knew that they should know exactly what I was referring to. They didn't. There were some awkward moments while they realized I was talking about diabetes. I felt...frustrated, upset, but mostly amazed.

I can't seem to fathom how people in my life can possibly forget about the chronic illness in my life. Maybe because of my diabetes, I am more aware of other people's problems. Maybe I need to give them a break. Or maybe, they should remember. Maybe I'm not wrong for feeling upset that they've forgotten my diabetes. Maybe I'm justified for feeling they need to remember the seriousness of this disease. Maybe they should remember reality.

Maybe. Just maybe.