Diabetic Recipes
The lies often grow more elaborate as Charlie's blood sugars grow higher.
• No, we can't get ice cream from the ice cream man. I don't have any money on me.
• Oh … this? No, that's not a real dollar. It's a prop. I got it from a magic shop. Poof! See? It's gone. No money.
• You wouldn't like this (Skittles). It's spicy.
• You wouldn't like this (Starburst). It fell in dog poop.
• You wouldn't like this (licorice). It was endorsed by a radical minister.
• You wouldn't like this (Pop Rocks). It will make your head explode.
• Yes, it will really make your head explode. Well, if mixed with soda. But even without the soda, you could easily lose an ear or two.
• You wouldn't like this (Dots). It's chewy because it's made from chopped up pieces of snake.
• I know it doesn't look like snake. That's because they've already put it through the candy-making machine.
• Damn right, it's poisonous! The machine doesn't remove the poison.
• It's a flaw that the candy people are working on.
• Sorry, you can't have those. I don't know how many carbs it has.
• I know "it says" 17 carbs on the back of the package, but it can't be trusted. These April Fools candies are tricky like that.
• No, I can't just bolus for it. The pump isn't calibrated for candy.
• Plus, it too fell in dog poop. Yucky!
• How about a nice piece of American cheese?
Obviously, he's too smart for most of those lies. Maybe he needs to be taught to handle the truth? Otherwise, the two of you are just playing a game with each other -- a game at which he will eventually outsmart you.
I once told Brendon that Oreos taste like broccoli after hearing a grandfather tell it to his grandson when he was begging for some at the checkout aisle of the supermarket.
It's harder to lie to him now that he's getting older and more savvy.
But telling the truth works pretty good too.
Yes, I'm exaggerating. Charlie knows the truth all too well. It's not uncommon to hear the following in our house several times a week. "Because you have diabetes and your blood sugar is high. That's why you can't have it."
But what if I like chopped up pieces of snake? ;)
mmmm, I could go for some chopped up pieces of snake right now!
How many carbs do chopped up pieces of snake have per slice? I'm getting ready to bolus!
Mousie