jhhwild

I was riding in the car with my friend the other day when all of the sudden, pretty much out of nowhere, he asked me the golden question. "So, what would you do Andy if you didn't have diabetes"? Immediately a weird feeling took over me. It was like my mind knew the answer to this simple question, but to my disbelief, I was unable to come up with anything. It's a question that I have asked myself over a million times. I have spent a lot of hours thinking about how my life would be, or what I would be doing, if I didn't have diabetes. Amazingly though, I didn't really know what to say. I kind of laughed, and looked at him and said, "dude,, I don't have any idea".

I wasn't mad at him; I guess I just wasn't expecting him to ask me anything like that. But it's not like people haven't asked me before. I guess it had just been a long time since anyone had.

So for the rest of the car ride, I guess I tried to come up with more of an answer. But basically I just kept coming up with nothing but laughter and puzzlement. I'd look at him and begin to try to come up with something intelligent like I actually had a "back-up" or "alternate" plan for the day I was no longer diabetic. Still nothing though. Does that mean that I have accepted I will always be diabetic? Does that mean that I have lived life so long as a diabetic that my mind no-longer operates in the "life without diabetes" realm? Have I come to peace with my diabetes?

So now I ask you the same question you have probably thought of a million times too. What would you do if you didn't have diabetes? Would your life be different and if so how? Is it unhealthy for you to try and think about life without diabetes when at this particular moment is not really a reality? What about your philosophy, are you someone who says things happen for a reason, and if so, why were you chosen to have diabetes?

Thanks for reading my blog today guys. -Andy