Did you see this story on the new type of diabetes that they've named today? It's really a sub-category of type 2 and many people will be moved from one diagnosis to the other.
Type 2.41 will make it clear to others immediately that the condition is the patient's fault, rather than just guessing as the population is forced to do now. This will make it much easier and more efficient to stereotype and discriminate.
Type 2.41 is characterized by obesity and couch potato tendencies and a ravenous appetite for refined carbohydrates and sugar. It also tends to indicate slovenliness, littering, an unwillingness to vote, owning a car that gets less than 20 MPG, poor personal hygiene and many other modern sins.
Type 2.41 is easily remedied, but we know it won't be as 'these people' are unwilling and uninterested in improving their lot in life.
The type 2 designation will now be reserved for folks who can document a daily calorie consumption under 2,000 for women and 2,400 for men; and a daily exercise routine that exceeds 33 minutes, the "Larry Bird" standard for diabetics. A genetic tendency towards the disease, proven by at least 2 DNA samples from ancestors, can be substituted for the exercise or the dietary restriction.
Sadly, this news story has been eclipsed today by the announcement of the "Butterfinger" candy bar changing it's name to "The Finger".














Unfortunately, this sometimes hits too many people too close to home to be a very funny April Fool's Joke. Which doesn't mean I'm not going to send it on.
I was completely suckered into this story and was outraged before I realized it was an april fools joke. Thank Goodness, Carolyn
I just hope you both got a laugh! Along with the subtext "moral" about not stereotyping, of course.
I got more laugh out of the "fingerbar" site... though a bit put-off that they used the *index* finger... sorry, but *THE* finger means something else to most of us in the United States...
It is a business, you can't really expect them to use "THE" finger and try to sell candy to children!
Oh my God - "the Larry Bird standard" ... that made me laugh out loud!!!