Diabetic Recipes
My Hourglass [Cloud]
Sometimes diabetes makes me feel so alone. I've always been the "token" diabetic in my family. And after almost fifteen years of being the only one, I'm adjusted to the idea. I'm good at doing this "alone." I actually like it. I know that no one I love deals with it. I never have anyone to blame. Plus it makes me unique.
In October of last year... that all changed. My dad was diagnosed with type 1. I've never worried about my parents getting it, only my future children. Yet here we are: my father has my disease. It feels horrible, a true blow to the gut.
One: his A1c was 12.6. His blood pressure and cholesterol are extremely high. All the warnings I've heard keep ringing in my head: heart disease and stroke are a diabetic's number one enemy.
Two: I want to blame him for my own diabetes. It's terrible, I know! But having this disease steal my life isn't easy, especially when there's no reason behind it. So now I can say it's genetic. I can say if he didn't have kids or if the factors weren't just right, I wouldn't have this.
Now three: It's genetic!!! The one thing I have always wanted and perhaps needed is to have kids. My ultimate fear is to have diabetic kids. I can't even begin to imagine the turmoil! Now it seems definite or way too elevated of a risk. If only I could keep them in a diabetes free bubble... Sadly, I can't. Now my dad's diagnosis forces me to choose between a diabetic-child free (and potentially child free) life or the biggest risk of my life. And if I choose option B, how do I live with the guilt if my kids get diabetes?
I'm not sure I'm prepared to handle this, but since when does diabetes care when you're prepared? I wasn't prepared at four to be "sugar free" and take three injections a day. I wasn't prepared at eleven to have a seizure at cheerleading camp. I'm not prepared at nineteen to handle my father's diagnosis. But hey, at least I'm not "alone" anymore!
I can't imagine how weird it must be to have a parent diagnosed with type 1 (I've always been the token diabetic in my family too).
As for the fear of passing on the genetic predisposition, I think that's something we've all worried about and debated at one point or another. Personally, I hope to have kids someday and I certainly hope that they never get the 'betes. But I don't think that having a disease with a genetic component is a reason to avoid having your own children if you want them, especially since there seems to be a pretty significant environmental component to T1 as well. I think your dad will benefit from your experience, as would any of our children.
Who knows what's floating around in their gene pool, and what will get passed on and what won't? There are many traits people pass on to their children that are WAY worse than diabetes - like stupidity, for instance. I'm pretty sure that's genetic.
HAHA sara... I don't know about stupidity being genetic but it has to be far worse than being diabetic. You're right that we never know what will pass on and what won't. I think some people just don't want to risk passing this on though. Personally, I couldn't handle my kids being diabetic. It would tear me apart. So if adoption or surrogacy are an option, I might take those routes. It's all an individual choice. For me, it just depends on who, what and where I am in life.
Hear. Hear. I agree. Diabetes can make you bond to your dad/child. We all know it's tough, but not the worst thing in the world ... perhaps, it's the one thing that helps us overcome our stupidity genes.
Nine months after I was diagnosed with Type 1 (the first and still the only one in my family), my father was diagnosed with Type 2. This was back in 1981, and I was 31, and we used to joke about it. With all the progress that is being made today regarding genetics, you are far better off now then just a few years ago. My advice: try and be optimistic.
I was just reading today that they've produced several embryos out of the DNA of three different individuals which would potentially prohibit passing on the "bad genes." Interesting to think about.... and thanks for the optimism, mark!
I can certainly understand your anxieties. I was born with a birth defect (corrected by surgery at age 5) of which I have never been able to confirm as being genetic or somatogenic (non-genetic)... and spent much time as a teenager worried that I might pass on that defect to any children I might bear.
So, you are quite normal in your trepidation!
The decisions you will need to make are: to have a family or not; to bear children or to acquire them through other means (adoption, fostering, stepparenting, surrogacy); your emotional and financial readiness to be a parent; and (often) the availability of a responsible co-parent and family support structure.
Consider also that, knowing the "diabetes ropes" already, if you should be responsible for a child with diabetes, you will already have the basic skills needed to usher him (or her) through growing up with the condition.
that's a great last thought, tmana! i've considered that angle a few times, but never long enough to realize the true benefits it would be. it's easier to get caught up in the fear!
I am the token diabetic in my family. I was diagnoised at 15. I am 30 now with 3 kids 7, 4, and 2. They are all healthly and fine. I worry that perhaps someday things might change but I do my best to feed them right and give them the best possible chance to steer clear of the diabetes road for now. If things change as least I know the warning signs and how to care for someone with this condition.
When I was diagnosed, I was considered to be Tpye 2. My doctor now calls me a type 1 1/2. I have two cousins who have been type 1 since they were 9 & 17. (both chose tubal ligation) My elderly uncle is has been type 2 for 10 years or so. My biggest hurdle has been to not accept the guilt trip that
Normies or Managing-2's lay on me. "What did you do wrong?", "How can you have changed types?", "Why doesn't the Levemir cover for you anymore?", "How can you get out of control when you aren't fat?" The cousins never had to put up with that kind of input. I'm wondering if Lindsey's dad is facing this challenge . . . Generally we 'adult-onset' diabetics face a lot of blaming. (And I imagine he's blaming his genes for his daughter's health issues!)
As to having kids, Lindsey, good luck and take a long time to study options. I have a type 1 friend that has two now and neither are diabetic (yet). Her pregnancies went well but she was in touch with a specialist daily by email and was monitored closely with a local endocrinolgist. The kids are great! As for myself, I am childless by choice, and made that choice before being diagnosed. My cousins chose to remain childless as much for their own health as to avoid possibly producing another generation of diabetics.