There is a lot going on today. A lot. I guess I'm not very happy, but I am trying my darndest to be. I am dealing with more emotions today than I can ever remember having. I have a lot of personal stuff happening and I have been trying to share as much of that with you all as I can. As you know, I am in the middle of a life changing experience with my career. Just last night I sent my resume, cover letter, and references off to what I hope to be my next, and potentially last employer. Also, so much is going on in the world with people suffering, hurting, and being sick. And last but not least, I wasn't able to train martial arts today, and instead I ate a freaking pizza.
So much is going on right now with people dealing with health and personal issues. A friend of my family has recently learned of some very serious health concerns. Someone else we know is battling for their life. And now, Heath Ledger is no longer with us. I pray for his family, the people that he loves and that love him too. I think it is so sad seeing images of him strewn across the headlines. I am so embarrassed and ashamed of people for how stories about his personal life are being thrown around right now. This is a time for him, his spirit, and his family. Not a time for paparazzi photographers to get the "best" shot or for horrible and distasteful headlines. I hope more people besides me are outraged about this too.
On top of that, I missed my training session today. I have been hitting it extremely hard lately. Mixed martial arts (MMA) training is my outlet for stress and all that stinks in life at the moment. You push yourself past all known limits. It's ultimately about just being prepared for anything difficult I could face in life. Truthfully, and maybe a psychologist would tell me this, MMA is just a defense mechanism that will prevent enduring a life altering experience (like the equivalent to getting another diabetes diagnosis). Personally, I think that's what makes a "good fighter" good. Some of the most infamous fighters and top athletes have something pushing them inside. Diabetes is definitely, ultimately, my driving force behind my desire to fight and wanting to be tough when it comes to dealing with the harsh stuff.
Thank you. -Andy.
