
I took Charlie to his endo appointment yesterday. It was the first time we didn't come with an unraveling scroll full of questions. I had no questions because I believe they have no answers.
It's not that Charlie is doing so poorly. His latest A1c of 8.2 was his best ever. But his numbers have been rough since school started and patterns have become difficult to spot.
A pair of medical students entered the room with big smiles and lots of questions. I couldn't help sounding very matter of fact and slightly defeatist.
"Yes, we're counting carbs correctly. Reading labels, subtracting fiber, all that fun stuff," I said.
"Yes, we have the Calorie King book."
A social worker came in next. She looked young - like she just came from cheerleading practice.
"How are you doing?" she asked with a well-practiced sympathetic pout, as she climbed atop the medical students on her knees, forming a pyramid - raising both arms to the sky.
"We're fine," I said.
I took her packet of support group information and out the door she went with an exaggerated slow-motion jog, her heels kicking her backside.
The nurse practitioner came in next. I didn't know when to spring the news on her. It got awkward once she started talking about our next visit.
She looked at Charlie's logbook and shook her head and said, "I just don't know what to tell you."
I knew she didn't, and that was the problem. With that I handed over the divorce papers of sorts and said goodbye to the hospital we've gone to for four years - since Charlie's diagnosis.
Since Charlie had given blood for his A1c just a month ago at a lab closer to home, we were both thrilled that he didn't have to have his blood drawn.
"Wanna go in there?" I asked him.
"Uh uh," he said with a smile as we walked past the phlebotomy office, giving it the finger with our eyes.
We jumped through the self-revolving door that led outside to a beautiful sunny day; narrowly escaping a surprise attack from security guards we pretended were stormtroopers.
On to greener pastures, we hope.
We have spirit, yes we do. We have spirit, how 'bout you?





