So much has happened this week that I can't even begin to express what is going through both my head and my heart in any logical form. I feel like life suddenly did a 180 degree turn. The kind of turn that you KNOW is there but still gets you EVERY time. I mean, I knew that life had to fall into place for me at some point. But when it actually happened, I was nearly dumbstruck.

First, Tuesday brought about my graduate school acceptance as well as a job interview from resumes I mailed out. Wednesday brought a second job interview that I am truly excited about and the finalization of my move on September 14th. Thursday, we had some family issues. Friday, I received my diploma in my hands instead of the promised "you'll get it eventually."

I am spending the weekend packing and crossing things off of my to do list. I've already managed to get my oil changed, sign up for my internet, schedule for my electricity to be turned on, and order my new sofa. Basically, all I've managed to do is spend a lot of money.

I also spent Friday morning in the doctor's office. I knew that I needed to get things done here with a doctor that I was comfortable with before moving to an entirely new city where I may not be able to find the right doctor for several months. I've been fairly happy with my endo here and really wish that I didn't have to change. Unfortunately, it doesn't make sense to keep one here so I went in for my final checkup.

She ran all my lab tests including a urinalysis because the UTI symptoms that I started antibiotics for on Sunday are still present (she also switched the antibiotics to be safe). She prescribed me at least six months for all my prescriptions so that I'm covered until I can replace her. And she also gave me resources to find a new endocrinologist.

I am very excited about the move. It's a brand new start for me. A new apartment, a new purpose, and a new location that I'm hoping opens great doors for me. Behind all that excitement is a very large sense of regret, pain, and sadness. At the root of it all, I don't want to leave my family and my friends here. I don't want to make the shift to a new town.

However, this is what I need and have to do for me. The pain and the sadness will subside with time. I'm hopeful that the regret will be overpowered by the excitement of the new start (and hopefully a new job). Moving four hours away is okay. I'll be fine. But with each cheer of excitement, there is still a twinge of heartache as I think about the things that I will miss here with my family and friends. I just keep thinking "what have I done?"

I'm very hopeful that I'll quickly shift into this new life and not stress over the money or the change. I'm hopeful that my numbers will settle once I've unpacked. I also hope that the regret continues to lessen and that this move is something that truly is what I needed to do.