Caller ID said "Chandler Primar" and in that moment "Primar" equalled "primary" which equalled "kids school" which equalled "oh crap what's wrong with the kids?" Didn't matter that the school's actual caller ID says the school's name.

"Hello?" I said.

"Hi this is garblegarblegarble from Dr. D's office," she said.

Dr. D? Is this one of the kids' doctors? No, that's Dr. N. Oh, wait, I'm coming to my senses now: Dr. D is my new primary care physician. OK, I got it.

"Oh, hi," I said.

She stumbled on her words as she began: "Dr. D got your recent bloodwork back and everything looks fine. Your clotting numbers all look good."

"OK good," I said, relieved.

"What about the Factor V?" I asked.

"That's good. All the clotting bloodwork came back good," she assured me. "But your sugar was 264. Do you have an endocrinologist?"

Oh, geez, I thought. How much of this am I going to have to explain? I started to get a little irritated because I knew I had told Dr. D that I have diabetes and that I'm on a pump and that I see an endo regularly.

See, last Thursday was actually the second time that week I had scheduled to have bloodwork done. I originally scheduled it for Tuesday (did you know you can make appointments at Quest Laboratories now? It's fantastic!) but based on several factors out of my control I woke up too low. I tried to skip my walk to see if that would help, but I wound up continuing to drop and had to drink a juice. I called the lab to see if my fasting bloodwork would be affected by the juice and they assured me it would.

Since it was so late in the scheduling period, my only option for a Thursday morning apointment was 9 a.m. I knew I would have to work hard to be high enough long enough to get through my walk and get to 9 a.m.

Despite my best efforts to be high (who'da thunk!) I wound up needing to disconnect my pump for about an hour, which of course made my blood sugar soar into the 300s.

So, did the nurse at Dr. D's office really want or need to know all that? Likely not. Would it have made a difference if I said all that? Likely not. So I simply told her that "Yes, I knew I was high, but it was intentional." She seemed confused. I explained a little more and she seemed to get it a little better, but I'm sure that saying "I did it on purpose" wasn't really what she was looking for.

"Well, Dr. D wants you to follow up with your endo and then follow up with Dr. D every six months," she said.

OK, clearly you're not getting it. "OK, thanks!" I said and we hung up.