Susanne went to Children's Hospital to talk to a family therapist about Charlie. He's been crying a lot in school.
We do everything we can to make him feel like a normal boy, but let's be honest – living with diabetes is not normal. There are times when he must eat Jell-O in school rather than the cookies or pretzels he thought he was going to have.
So he cries. He rubs his eyes with his fists, runs into the hallway or bathroom and cries. Charlie's teacher has expressed that he's becoming more and more upset when high blood sugars prevent him from eating what he wants to eat. I'm sure the high blood sugar in itself contributes to his inability to control his emotions.
Susanne thought the meeting with the therapist went well.
Here are some "Don'ts" Susanne came away with:
The Main Event
Don't make diabetes the main focus of everything. Susanne mentioned to her that I blog about diabetes and how we're very involved with the Walk to Cure Diabetes and how I'm on the board of JDRF. "That's all fine," she said. "Just don't make diabetes such a large focus of attention in your daily life at home." I'm paraphrasing. Easier said than done, me thinks.
Reacting to High Blood Sugars
Susanne mentioned that I sort of lose it sometimes when I see an insanely high number. She may have been referring to just the other day when I saw 498 on the meter's screen and screamed like I shattered my ankle in 29 places.
"Don't do that," the therapist said.
Going forward, I will excuse myself from the situation reservedly, run a mile into the wilderness and howl my head off. Or I will keep it inside and learn how to hide my feelings.
The Truth? You Can't Handle the Truth!
Don't use the meter that talks to the pump. The idea here is that at this time – while diabetes is causing Charlie some serious stress, he doesn't need to see every single high blood sugar that flashes on his pump screen. Using the other meter, we can say "you're a little on the high side" rather than letting him see yet another awful number.
Not so sure about this one. Charlie will demand to know the number.
Back Off – The Sequel
The therapist told Susanne that it is common for parents of children diagnosed as toddlers to be extra protective, but we need to loosen the reigns a bit. This echoes the endocrinologist's recommendation to "back off." Since Charlie started elementary school, we have had health aides keeping an eye on him, following him with diabetes bag in hand. The therapist said that by doing this, we are eliminating issues before they occur. In clearing this path for Charlie, he doesn't learn how to resolve problems on his own. Next year (second grade), that will all change.
First things first. If I'm going to make diabetes less of a focus in our house, I should start with Charlie's room. Anybody want any posters of famous diabetic athletes? I'm tearing them all down. See ya, PGA golfer Scott Verplank. Adios, NHL hockey player Nick Boynton. Nice knowin' ya, U.S. Olympic gold medalist Gary Hall Jr. So long, NBA basketball player Adam Morrisson. Farewell, Halle Berry.
What!!! She was an athlete in high school! Actually, Upon further review, Charlie and I have decided it's probably best if we keep [ahem] the Halle poster up a little longer.
Oh, Charlie also has one of those 2009 'Days with Diabetes' desk calendars I should probably toss out. Let's see, what's today, June 16?
June 16, 2009
Day 2,035 with diabetes
That can't be healthy.
