In one of my high school English classes, we had to read Samuel Beckett's play of this name. Thirty-some-odd years later, I don't remember the details, only that it centered around two men who seemed to be relatively old, penniless, and alone. They met at a particular spot each day, left each evening, and could only remember one day past and think towards one day forward. They awaited a third character, the eponymously named "Godot", who never arrived. The style was considered existentialist in that there wasn't all that much character development: what you saw was what you got. While I never read the French original, in English, "Godot" seemed a thinly-veiled metaphor for "G-d" — and since old, penniless (and possibly homeless) folk have always had the shortest from-this-point life expectancy, it made sense — at least on one level — that these two characters were waiting to die.

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It's hard to be sad when you have diabetes.  It really does complicate the hell out of heartache. 

There are so many things in my life that are beautiful, gorgeous, and easy.  That keep me smiling and feeling good.  Lately though, there's been one area of struggle.  I won't go into the details, but let's just say anyone who's experienced real love and then real confusion around that real love could relate.

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It feels like I've been lying in the rain for an hour.  I am soaked.  And where the hell am I?  How is it raining?  I'm inside, right? 

I can see the ceiling, its popcorn bumps popping out, and the place where it meets the hot pink wall in this room.  My room?  This is my room, right?  Oh, god, how did I get so wet?  And cold.  I'm shivering.  But why am I sweating?  I think I'm cold.

I feel nauseous too.  Really, really sick to my stomach.  I'm pretty sure I can't get up.  The floor seems a long way away. 

I pull out my insulin pump, which feels foreign in my hands, not at all like a part of my body (that's how it usually feels).  And I look for the CGM screen, but I can't find it.  And it doesn't occur to me that I'm not wearing the CGM, that I'm taking a break.  I can't really read the pump screen anyway, can I? 

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The past few mornings, I've noticed a tingling, shocking pain in my heels when I take my first steps. It happens in both feet and disappears after a few steps. And it's got me worried.

I have full sensation in both my feet and pass the neuropathy test every time my doctor does (twice this year, last in October). I do get heaviness in my legs and foot pain sometimes, but it usually coincides with wearing heels too often, being on my feet for long periods of time, or strenuous exercise. It's never been that concerning.

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Good news.  Bad news.  Ain't that the way it always goes?

Good news.  On Monday, I received my Mini-Link CGM from Minimed.  Thanks to a blessing from people who don't even really know me.  Cool, right?  

It's been pretty fantastic to be able to see my bloodsugars in real time.  I've had no problems with calibration and I've been consistently within 5-15 mg/dl points of the CGM for each meter reading.  The swings I've been having are easier to catch before they happen and I haven't had even one low or extreme high since I hooked up on Monday.  Even with three boxing classes this week - tough 900 calorie burning - hour plus work outs.  And I've stayed in range throughout every one of them, since I've known my bloodsugar and the direction it's headed in well in advance.  

I honestly couldn't be more thankful.

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Well, it's that time of year again. The Web Warren Cookie Labs are setting up for the current season's research experi production run. In addition to the usual questions of which general types of cookies to bake, the specific sub-varieties start screaming out for attention.

That we will be "open for business" is without question. That we will be performing a certain degree of "quality control" goes without saying. The sizes of most of the cookies (small to miniature) have been predetermined by previous feedback. The questions include how many varieties to make, and whether to use wheat flour or another flour, sugar or Splenda, butter or yogurt-based blends, how many versions of a particular variety to make, and which ones to decorate.

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