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Practice makes near perfect at bedtime

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October 26, 2016
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I've gotten so damn nosey since diabetes entered my life. Not only that, I think everyone around me either currently has type 1 diabetes or has the symptoms of type 1 diabetes.

I was at the pool yesterday when my eyes made immediate contact with a pump port on a man's hairy belly. I locked on from about 50 feet away the moment he removed his shirt. Fortunately, I didn't point and scream, "DIABETES!!!!! DIABETES!!!!" really loud like I usually do.

With the visuals on my diabetes radar clearly in good working condition, I tested out my audio signals while working on a blog post for Blogabetes. Simultaneously, I watched Charlie do flips off the diving board and prayed that with each impact, he wasn't slowly peeling the sensor from his arm.

Then I get nosey - tapping into a conversation between a mother and her 5-ish year-old daughter as they walk to the bathroom. I turn and cock my head like a satellite dish to the direction of the chatter.

I’m like Superman the way I pick up these amplified sounds - only without his super strength, his handsome features and his love for mankind. I’m left with his more perverse and intrusive powers of super hearing and X-ray vision; though only as it relates to diabetes.

"Do you even really have to go to the bathroom?" the frustrated mom barked.

“This is like the fourth time you’ve gone!”

My muscles tensed. My radar was going nuts. I have to do something, I thought to myself. She clearly has diabetes but they don’t even know it! They need me! I must save them!

“I’m coming!!!”

With a Super Mario beach towel as my cape, I stood on my chair and leapt into the air, forgetting that I also lack the power of flight.

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